Love me for who I am

Staying fit with someone who loves to eat is one of the most difficult challenge you could have. I have lots of friends who loves to eat and laughs at you whenever they know you’re on a diet. Friend indeed they say. As I challenge myself to stay fit starting tomorrow, I still want to stick to my convictions and perceptions in life. “Love yourself” is one of the common sayings and facts in order to stay fit. I love myself that comes to the point of bulging into any kind of food as long as it seems delicious. And the no guilt-free experience starts to creep in to regrets that should’ve been exercise rather than calorie gained experience. I love myself that I don’t want to feel and encounter those kinds of calories gained experiences.

As I continue to observe men, I would totally agree that they are indeed visual. They like model-like body features. Even as a lady, I admire those models that stays fit and fabulously lean. But what I just can’t accept coming from a man is that he would not like me for being ME. You see, my body structure is some like heavy bottom, curvy yet still beautiful (Confident!!). Hearing those compliments and comments from men rings my bell that says “I will not make an effort just for you to like me…. and fit in to your standard! Love me for who I am”. Those were the words that encourages me to focus on the motive of exercising – loving myself. My body is not mine, and I’m not getting younger. I should take care of my body, as a gift from Above, As a steward I should know how to control my eating habits and to enjoy food as well.

Love me for who I am not by what you want to see. I don’t want to be selfish through that statement mentioned earlier but its absurd as a woman who wants to fit in to that criteria that will never make it. In the end I know that someone will love me for who I am and will not push me to do things that I don’t want to do. I believe that someone will encourage me with his gentle words of motivation, I believe that someone out there will everyday say I am beautiful no matter what is my vital statistics. I believe that more than desires actions should still follow.

Top 10 things my ‘future’ husband ‘must’ love about me

I was drove by one of my friends to write. HAHA. I like her blogs and it simply inspires me to write more too… You can check her site here : http://ramonafayealicarte.wordpress.com/ Go girl!

I do a lot of things and it gets to their nerve especially when I’m with my siblings but if they really value me they do not have a choice but to reconsider it! (LAUGH out LOUD). So here are some TOP 10 things my husband SHOULD and MUST love about me. This is a bit of a warning though. P.S — I am not yet married… But I will soon.. CLAIMING it already! 🙂 Well, so much for the talk. Let me start my number one! 🙂

No. 1 I don’t eat breakfast (sometimes) 🙂 So, Honey, if you like breakfast, since I am submitted to you, I guess I’ll adjust myself and cook a delicious bacon and prepare a cup of coffee for you.

No. 2 I don’t like dogs anymore (if I am married already). BUT if Honey, you want, I can still learn how not to hate them. 😀 I know they are adorable especially the pups, yeah, I can think about it. 🙂

No. 3 I love the night skies, I gaze upon them every night. So Honey, if you wanna ask me out for a date, I just have a couple and simple request, “in the evening with beautiful lights and a healthy food in a classic table..” Plus walk with me hand in hand in a cool wind breeze.

No. 4 My love language is TIME . You  should know this before you laid down your intentions my love. 🙂 So, if you are workaholic, please don’t be, you can bring your work at home but please be reminded I am still nearby – your inspiration.

No. 5 I love FERRERO Rocher and Hersheys chocolates. If you will make me stop eat chocolates specifically the ones I mentioned earlier? I will really get mad at you…

No. 6 I love SHAWARMA, as long as, the company gets the perfect taste of the GARLIC SAUCE. So Honey, if you don’t like meditterenean cuisine  I’ll dine in alone … Can you tolerate that? 😦

No. 7 I cry sometimes while praying. So Honey, bear with me if we pray together 🙂 I just can’t contain God’s faithfulness in our lives…

No. 8 I cook tasteless foods. (not all the time) Honey I’m so sorry if even in our marriage you’ll witness my tasteless cooks, at least, it is still cooked by me but for the record, I don’t cook unhealthy foods. (HAHA) But don’t worry I will try my best to satisfy your taste buds.

No. 9 I love notebooks. I love to write. If you would like to ask my family, I have tons of notebooks. JOURNALS. DIARIES. ORGANIZERS. So, you know what to give me on my first birthday together 😀

No. 10 I am hoping that once we get there? When we exchange “I do’s” I know you are a book lover and I am too, but one of my dreams is to have “our” room with tons of your and my books…I pray you’ll spare a room for our mini library.. 🙂

So, ladies and gentlemen, here are my top 10 things my FUTURE husband ‘must’ love about me. 🙂 I just don’t get my title? :)) HAHAHA. But for sure, my future spouse is already included in my TOP 10 and he should really love the things I love 😀 and if he doesn’t its okay, I want to be submissive 🙂

photos: courtesy of google images 🙂 not min 😀

Secured

What do I long for? Where do I really put my trust, hope and security? Where is my faith? Can faith move mountain? Am I really loved? Is there someone praying for me? When will I get what I want? What is it that I want?

These were my confusing questions battling repeatedly in my mind. These were the questions that ALMOST shook my faith. Questions that were answered already yet I ignored and bypass them.I honestly admit that I find trust, hope and security from other people. You might ask me: Where else you must put them? Let me just share a brief testimony that there is someone else you can trust other than the people you thought could stay forever.

A friend of mine kept on reminding me, “KNOW YOUR PRIORITIES”, another friend told me“SURRENDER AND FOCUS” and finally God repeatedly told me “Do not be afraid…” “Leave your country and I will bless you..” “Stop doubting and believe..” “I give you peace..” “Be still and know that I am God..” and capital letters O-B-E-Y. Of course my friends were really instruments of God, even my Dad encouraged me through God’s word and same revelations. But really God is insisting me“Let go and let Me do my job in your life my princess”.

After all the reminders and all God’s ways, the question is still there. “Where do I really put my trust, hope and security?” So I meditate on it day and night: Where? How much time do I spend in God’s word? Do I spend more time with my family? Am I really in focus? Did I really surrender it all to God? God answered it, and I felt so ashamed and sorry for myself before God (as in if you really know what it feels) that I keep on insisting what I want to happen in my life. Nakakahiya lang talaga kay God that every devotion, He keeps on reminding me what to do, until I’ve been misled with my emotions and selfish ambitions that are not from God. I’ve been carried away with all the funs and blessings He has given me that I haven’t notice my time and energy is wasted so much to the least priorities.

But you know what? God did not give up on me! He nonstop convicted me through His word and used people close to my heart to open my eyes and heart. God’s faithfulness to our forefathers remained the same, “The Lord was with me…” Always! Not only during the good times but also in bad times. Joseph the dreamer was successful because of the Lord’s presence In His life. Jacob believed that God is with him wherever he goes. Abraham obeyed and God graciously fulfilled His covenant and promise to him. From generation to generation even before Christ, God’s love and faithfulness is upon His people. And I believe in our generation, it may seem impossible but those who believe in the Lord, nothing is impossible.

Going back, God did not give up on me, He fulfilled His promises. Even I had a heart of stone or dry heart, He continued His mission to me. He used my family and friends to slap my face back and forth like “Shekyna! Wake up! FOCUS! Look at Jesus only.” God’s sweetness may be shown in different ways, He gave me friends that I can talk to, friends who envisioned and prayed for me. I believe this is it! (God really answered these prayers).

God will not allow my impurities to conquer my whole being instead God made a way that I could talk to the people I encountered misunderstandings. He gave me confidence, willingness and boldness how I felt during those times (Soul tie, like my friend shared to me once) and try to fix things by His grace. It is really God’s perfect time for us to exchange apologies and acceptance of being new creation of God. I can really see the changes, though I am not saying that I am ALL out OKAY because I am still in process of continuous change for God’s glory. I entrusted all aspect of my life one by one to God. I invest more time with my family (siblings specifically) and update my dad with all the happenings and time for my victory group. All in all what I have concluded, it’s really a matter of obedience.

As I mentioned earlier, God did not give up on me, He gave me a second chance. Now that I have done some of His request and I am still willing to give my ALL to Him, like what He promised “I leave you peace. I give you peace – Jesus”. I can now answer the question directly, “Where do you put your trust, hope and security?” – in God alone. I am saying this because again I found what I’ve been longing for, well I had it with me, I had it in me, but I haven’t notice that I am being selfish until it made my heart dry. I realized that even you have the love of Christ in you, even you live in Christ, each of us, needs to nurture it through meditating and application on God’s word. Although I admit that this wasn’t an easy one, yung ibigay mo lahat lahat, it takes a courage to give up the people you love but since kilala ko kung kanino ko pinagkakatiwala ang buhay ng mga taong mahal ko, I believe that they are in good hands of my Abba Father and these are just some of my resolved issues that were entrusted to God and I am still willing to surrender all the things I haven’t surrendered. I am willing and open to obey God more than ever. He deserves my best and I want to give it all to Him. I put my trust, hope and security to my God alone. Right now, I am claiming my total purification and refinement. How about you? Where do you put your trust, hope and security? Check your heart again.